Make Believe

 

Has anyone ever taken a moment or two off life to simply just wonder... wonder about life and its beauty for a moment, rather than burning our brain cells thinking deeply about its negatives... "Make Believe" are two words that built that huge and wondrous wall of ours that we called childhood memories... sadly, the devastating truth is that reality happened to destruct it... and that's what we called adulthood... authors, poets, and even painters still have these walls built around them, to protect them... to secure them... because they refused to block the beauty of life, simply because the negatives came in strong... when that writer carries that pen, not even the sky is the limit... when that painter holds that brush, not even reality can knock down his wall... I Know that i still wonder... and the more i got closer to losing everything... the more i seemed to wonder... love inspires my inner child to endlessly make believe... and love, is the roses biggest secret... i wonder... what if the trees fumbles were whispers to us about the future, but we are too deaf to listen? what if the morning light beams capture our memories only to become the shining stars in the dark sky so that it may shine our way towards success, but we were too ignorant to notice? And what if the white roses, covered with all the lovers pain, turn red, carrying in its mesmerising colours a love story, but we were too blind to see?

         I once was also ignorant, blind, and deaf... but, i found the music of someone Else's soul that tugged on my heart strings... and by true love, i met poetry and art... you can say my love life is a disaster... we spend hours away from one another awaiting fates call so we can finally talk to each other again... it doesn't happen very often, we rarely talk without getting caught, i was enslaved from my freedom, my parents are against the one I'm in love with, and the moon is our only soul colider... yet, my soul lives it all with a true mate... i live it all with a true love... when we have little moments to talk, we make the best of it, he texts me everyday telling me that no matter what he will never give up... and tonight as i type this here, i am under the full moon thinking of him... and i am not alone... because there he is.... on the other side... HERE he is by my side... looking at it too...
deal?  

The mistakes in our fate..

 How can one be the possessor of such an insisting fate, yet be the pray of such a heart breaking outcome? How we met? How we fell in love? How our souls were forced apart? In every single form of this equation the answer was always the same no matter how i chose to solve it... when the clouds lips parted to reveal the naked moons light, i was in bed trembling with sweat dripping from my fine white soft skin... As the music of the dreams played its melody while dancing with my thoughts.. There he was.. After one whole year of being apart in my dreams he stood tall right before my eyes. Hair of pure dark gold brushing on his light brown exotic eyes... on his perfect brimming lips drew a small smile welcoming in all the feelings of affection and memories of the past that i thought were long gone. That very same day i walked alone in the supermarket. lost. Once i realised that i was alone, i saw this familiar face of a man who looked like a little boy i once loved... i walked around him thinking that such a coincidence just doesn't happen but in movies... once his eyes met mine i felt a hot rush oozing from my heart strings and flaring onto my cheeks... i went up to him with a wide smile stretching as far as the angles of my lips can go "Majd Ibrahim?" i found my vocal strings singing once he looked at me. He smiled back and said "yes... do i know you?" i thought maybe the years

changed me, that's why he didn't notice me...but regardless of the years id know my true love anywhere... After an hour of talking we both caught up on everything and he did remember me, and just to make it more interesting i told him goodbye without giving him my phone number...A month or two after we were reunited he visited me at my dancing night in the theatre... he ran towards me with his hands up in the air only to meet one another around my neck..."i need to talk to you" he whispered to me above all the noises of the people congratulating me and the other performers for a wonderful night "i cant now... ill talk to you some other day okay?" i smiled and hugged him goodbye... As the clocks hands started to move and the weather changed from cold to hot i finally received a text... "hello" it said "its majd... i asked your friend for your number, i hope you don't mind... i really miss you and I'm here with all honesty to confess" i sent back "Confess to what? that you cheated on me? that your dead girlfriend never existed? that you were just a kid living his life?" he did confess to everything and i did forgive him... because that's the thing about maturity ... you forgive and forget... we spent months after that day texting till 1:00am and spending all night till the black night whispers for its yellow sun.... on the phone debating about life, music, poetry, and politics... as time passed friendship turned into something much more precious.. and that was what fate has got us together for... Love. Oh, how we were in love... no secrets, no complications, no hesitation, and no awkwardness. We could speak for hours about anything and never felt bored... i could insult his whole family and he'd never feel offended ... wed flirt and laugh at how cheesy we sounded... wed make plans for the future and talk about it like we were living it now... id sing to him and he'd play the piano and the bass for me... it was perfect... not even the movies could capture such pure and perfect love...

but of course my parents begged to differ... they never liked majd... and once they found out that majd and i were in love... they locked me in between four walls with no source of communication until he is gone... on the phone late at night id talk to him with tears burning.. burning my cheeks! making its way down to my lonely hands...    "I'm so sorry to have gotten you into this.." i said...he whispered to me before the strident noise of silence filled our ears.... "its fine... i love you... i never loved any one the way i do you... your my best friend, my only friend. I've never met anyone like you.. and i never will.. remember to keep looking at the moon... because at night im with you on the other side looking at it too... i hope someday fate does it again and lets us meet again..." Oh majd... i know fate is kind.. and i do believe that someday we shall fall in love again... till then, my eternal love...
Feel free to tell me what do you think, and share your advice or opinions with me.

The 3rd full moon

Tonight, I walked down the streets in the presence of the ghost from our past love. It was the third full moon this summer. I hummed our song while I laid underneath the stars with my heart filled in shattered memories that are now no more. Since the day he was gone a part of me has perished. But I know our love will some day be incipient again. In these few days I have learnt how to move on in the absence of he,but I have slowly come to understand the reason for his farewell. Distnce. Distance is the reason he let go of me, he never moved on or stopped loving me. In distance love loses its passion and its strength. It's like a fire once so very strong but at the end it extinguishes once and for all. So now if fate is kind and reunites our hearts once more then it shall be. 

Our future is in the hands of our destiny. If it is meant to be then only time could reveal the truth.. 

   

Forbiden love

But who is he? He is the other peice of my soul, and with that I know him far more than he knows himself. He loves me. Even if he won't admit,he has left signs, and again the 13 year old comes out crying to me and saying he wishes I was in his arms under the romantic sunset, oh but my beloved, if only you knew how much I wanted to tell you at that moment what you meant to me, I always knew that little boy in you is still there, and he is the one i love, and I know he loves me so. Some people were only meant to love each other, but not be together. This is true love, for our souls have discovered it selves in the others heart.
I shall never give up.
But I do know that if this is true love yet we are far apart.
This is Forbiden Love.

The Hardest Goodbye...

   Now here I am..after a full year...a year with that one person I loved and always will more than anything...I looked at him and whispered "do u love me?" when I heard him say yes in my head a million times his true reply was "I don't know" that very moment I felt my whole world come to an ending...its over I tell myself...my true love..isn't...a cold rush runs through my spine as a flash comes in front of me and displays our shadowy past..from sitting under the tree with his arms around me till his very last words....Good Bye....it was the end..I held him in my arms for the last time...it didn't feel the same,but when he let go...it was over...I didn't bother to fight...I know I can't give him all he wants..and what is love? Nicholas Sparks has told me...its when  you put your partners happiness before your owns no matter how much pain it will cause you,so I'm letting him go for his happiness...and today...as I stand beside my window and search for the full moon in the night sky...for that's how it was the first time he told me he loves me...a full moon... I think of our every word,every second,ever memory,every love...no matter how many years pass by...he will always be the 13 year old Majd that i met on October 10 with hair spiked up and circled glasses....he will always love me like that year we spent together...in my head he will always hold me in his arms...but today as he stands in front of me...he is 14 with hair down and a gentleman's looking glasses with a job and more responsibilities ...to me he will always remain that 13 years old...
and i will always...
 always love him...
 Farewell my lover....

True Love Never Fades

It has been a while since I have blogged I am sorry dearly my fellow readers,but to all the people out there who still seek true love, I would like to tell you all, that true love never fades... as you all know I met my true love and I was forbidden to ever being with him again,after a while of trying to make it work out. I never gave up but, he did,we both were in pain and based on what his friends told me he couldn't stand to see me suffer anymore.We haven't talked afterwards for over 2 months.may 27,it was my birthday we talked for the first time in 3 months I instantly fell in love with him all over again , for the reason that kept me moving on was denying it all and not seeing nor talking to him and after that week ended he came to me and told me he still loves me...If a love is true then not even denying it can ever prevent it from going on.. True love dose exist and it never fades even in its purest ....

Majd Ibrahim i loved you before 

i love u still and i promise you...

  i always will...

Best Vacation Ever

      So my ex "new best friend" still loves me! and his mother was whom admitted that to me! he keeps impressing me and he actually bought me a bracelet! but after all that me and my ex's mother became very close friends we went shopping together! wow my life is messed up! hahaha but hey a normal life is boring right?